Case Conceptualization
The couple’s presenting problem is that they would like to stop arguing about where and with whom they spend their weekends. The precipitating factor is that neither Romulus nor Skyler feels the other understands their position about this issue.
The perpetuating factor in the relationship is that instead of spending a weekend or two alone, the couple is constantly attending family gatherings with Romulus’s family. As a result, Skyler feels that she can never do what she wants to do. The predisposing factors are that Romulus grew up with a very close-knit extended family and was taught that family comes first. Meanwhile, Skyler’s family is more disengaged, so she has spent much more time on her own.
The couple’s protective factors include Skyler’s appreciation for Romulus’s family. She enjoys seeing them but would be happier with more alone time with Romulus, as she cares deeply about him. Romulus and his family also show they care for Skyler by accommodating her dietary needs as a vegetarian when preparing meals.
Intervention and Rationale
The first intervention for the couple is identifying shared values and promoting couple cohesion. This intervention would involve Skyler and Romulus identifying shared values, such as emotional closeness, intimacy, and/or quality of their relationship. By focusing on these shared values, they can reinforce the reasons they got together in the first place.
A second recommended intervention is targeting cognitive fusion. This would require the couple to reevaluate their internal dialogue, or “self-talk,” and identify potentially negative “language traps” that affect their view of themselves, their partner, and their relationship. For example, Romulus might hold an unspoken rule about visiting family every weekend and expect Skyler to accept this routine. Identifying such rules and replacing them with ones that align better with both partners’ values can help promote more meaningful, value-driven interactions.
A third intervention is promoting committed couple action. As seen in Romulus and Skyler’s situation, partners may feel they need to sacrifice their own desires for the relationship, potentially leading to resentment. This intervention encourages an egalitarian approach to problem-solving, increasing resilience to stress and promoting couple cohesion. The therapist might ask the couple to define what it means to be a “good partner” and identify behaviors that make each partner feel appreciated in the relationship.